If you are about to create kids so they’ll support you during your old age, you need to stop. Right now. Go put on a condom and keep reading.
At the risk of sounding unfilial, we’re just gonna say it.
This is an extremely outdated mindset that lots of Singaporean (and Asian) parents cling on to. And it’s causing people (and future people) lots of misery.
Now, raising kids for some sort of economic benefit might have made sense when humans lived in an agricultural society – more children meant more hands to help out on farms.
But guys, less 1% of Singapore’s population are farmers.
Times have changed. Here’s why you should let it go.
Treating your kids like investments is really sucky for them.
If you start off wanting your kid to support you, chances are you will direct them towards a few stereotypical lucrative or stable careers, not the ones they enjoy doing sustainably.
No parent should limit their kid to a few preselected careers, because that only limits their worldview.
In addition, you’d also be denying them the opportunity of making decisions and gaining ownership of their successes (if any).
To put it bluntly, not prepping for your own retirement will make you a burden
When you demand money from your kid every month, you’re taking away money that could potentially be used for their future. Compared to other kids whose parents have prepared for retirement, yours will be seriously disadvantaged.
In a world where income inequality is rising, they’ll struggle to make ends meet after you’re gone.
The best gift you can give your child? The gift of letting them not worry about you.
If you treat your children like investments, don’t be surprised when they view you as a liability.
Here’s what you should do instead: raise them with enough love so they’ll willingly look after you.
One of the worse things you can do as a parent is to create a relationship that is purely transactional. Raising someone to support you in the future kinda does that.
Let’s get one thing clear.
It’s one thing for a parent to ask for reasonable financial help because they are struggling to get by. That’s completely acceptable.
But it’s another to think your kids are forever indebted to you because you pooped them out 30 years ago – a choice they never had, tbh.
If you wanted to retire in riches, there are far better financial instruments for that.
Kids are not only expensive. They are terrible for your career. They can’t be diversified. They fall sick, cause insomnia and supporting them may give you high blood pressure and stroke. Your body literally suffers as a result of having them.
Plus, you’ll also need to spend a lot of time with them so they turn out ok. Because kids with the wrong values are probably the kids not worth having.
They are essentially a high-risk investment with no guarantee.
Finally, it’s okay not to have kids if you think they’ll cause you a lot of financial misery.
Old people and traditionalists might call you selfish for pursuing your own happiness.
But really, having kids so they can look after you – isn’t that more selfish?
Stay Woke, Salarymen.
