Feeling so much for you my dear, I’m glad more stories like this are coming out, not all parents deserve unquestioned filial piety, and children shouldn’t be in this position to take care of parents almost like a child, but receive love. Sigh.
Girl, if you read this, just letting you know that you did the right thing and you’re not alone in this. I admire you for daring to make a change.
Someone somewhere in this world also experience what you are going through. It is something difficult to talk about what more to share with other people especially in Asia. “After all, she is your mom. Go back to her. Don’t ever talk bad about your mom.” This is what a daughter gets for suffering years of abuse similar like yours.
When the daughter was young and living under her mom’s roof, mom would kick her out of the house from time to time. It seems satisfying for the mom when her helpless young daughter crying and begging her not to kick her out. At times, mom would say things like “You are born to be my slave.” or “If I’m not happy, you are not allowed to be happy.” And refuse to send her daughter to school when she was angry.
When the daughter was in her 20s, mom had no assets left and had fully depleted her own funds, being completely dependent on her only daughter. Now staying in her daughter’s house, mom would still gaslight, throw things around, hit her daughter until the daughter left her own house. As the daughter left the house, mom followed her from behind, shouting and cursing: “You useless daughter! You leave the house without leaving any cash for me? What do I eat for the days to come?” Daughter paused at the grill. She put down her luggage, and put whatever cash she had left on the table. As mom take it, mom continued to say “You useless! Leave! When I find you, I will pull your hair, I will kick your car and burn it down! I will show the world what a terrible daughter you are! Because a good mom will not do this to her daughter unless her daughter is terrible. Let the whole world see!” Mom’s voice faded away as the daughter drove off. This happens 5 years ago.
Now in her 30s, her mom is still living with her because mom had nowhere to go. Mom is better now after her daughter finally revealed to her how bad this had affected her mental health. There are times she almost couldn’t make it to survive. Mom finally “woke up”. There are times she is still abusive but only once in a blue moon.
Only God knows how this daughter had suffered. The trauma and all. She had no siblings, no father, not many friends. She only had herself to rely on even until today. Still trying to survive, trying to not just “leave” this world.
Thank you for telling this story. My girlfriend grew up in a similar situation where her father was very abusive towards her. To this day, he blames his own misery on her existence even though she’s the most wonderful person I have ever known. She feels hopeless about her family situation but seeing this story makes me feel like she isn’t alone. Please feel free to share any resources that may help someone in this situation.
No words. Just sending love and light to the lady behind this story.
Feeling so much for you my dear, I’m glad more stories like this are coming out, not all parents deserve unquestioned filial piety, and children shouldn’t be in this position to take care of parents almost like a child, but receive love. Sigh.
You did your best, love.
Girl, if you read this, just letting you know that you did the right thing and you’re not alone in this. I admire you for daring to make a change.
Someone somewhere in this world also experience what you are going through. It is something difficult to talk about what more to share with other people especially in Asia. “After all, she is your mom. Go back to her. Don’t ever talk bad about your mom.” This is what a daughter gets for suffering years of abuse similar like yours.
When the daughter was young and living under her mom’s roof, mom would kick her out of the house from time to time. It seems satisfying for the mom when her helpless young daughter crying and begging her not to kick her out. At times, mom would say things like “You are born to be my slave.” or “If I’m not happy, you are not allowed to be happy.” And refuse to send her daughter to school when she was angry.
When the daughter was in her 20s, mom had no assets left and had fully depleted her own funds, being completely dependent on her only daughter. Now staying in her daughter’s house, mom would still gaslight, throw things around, hit her daughter until the daughter left her own house. As the daughter left the house, mom followed her from behind, shouting and cursing: “You useless daughter! You leave the house without leaving any cash for me? What do I eat for the days to come?” Daughter paused at the grill. She put down her luggage, and put whatever cash she had left on the table. As mom take it, mom continued to say “You useless! Leave! When I find you, I will pull your hair, I will kick your car and burn it down! I will show the world what a terrible daughter you are! Because a good mom will not do this to her daughter unless her daughter is terrible. Let the whole world see!” Mom’s voice faded away as the daughter drove off. This happens 5 years ago.
Now in her 30s, her mom is still living with her because mom had nowhere to go. Mom is better now after her daughter finally revealed to her how bad this had affected her mental health. There are times she almost couldn’t make it to survive. Mom finally “woke up”. There are times she is still abusive but only once in a blue moon.
Only God knows how this daughter had suffered. The trauma and all. She had no siblings, no father, not many friends. She only had herself to rely on even until today. Still trying to survive, trying to not just “leave” this world.
Thank you for telling this story. My girlfriend grew up in a similar situation where her father was very abusive towards her. To this day, he blames his own misery on her existence even though she’s the most wonderful person I have ever known. She feels hopeless about her family situation but seeing this story makes me feel like she isn’t alone. Please feel free to share any resources that may help someone in this situation.